Nerds seem to think that because he’s the wisest being in their made-up nerd universe, what scriptwriters had him say automatically makes Yoda genuinely full of deep, penetrating wisdom.

Now, suppose there is a man in prison. He continuously makes escape attempts, each time being thwarted by the prison guards. He is not escaping, but neither is he not-not escaping. He is trying to escape. To get rid of “trying” as a concept is to eliminate will and intention on one side of the scale, or to ignore the contingencies of everyday life that might impede a successful attempt on the other.

We do not have foreknowledge of the future, so unless you believe Yoda is implying a fatalistic universe wherein success and failure are already preordained, then the next time you feel the need to bring up your nerd bullshit when somebody quite properly uses the term “try”, you need to shut the fuck up when grown folks is talking.

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